I found this week’s edition of Jenna Marbles’ rants, raves and general ridiculousness particularly amusing. In it, she takes a little time to analyze and process the oddities and inconsistencies evident in some of the world’s most treasured Disney movies as compared to what we know of as reality.
So what exactly do Disney movies teach children and how do they shape those young, malleable minds? In really fucked up ways, that’s how…
It’s Wednesday, weeeeeeeee! And of course with another Odin’s Day comes a new and exciting episode from the woman I will one day sedate and force to marry me, the one, the only, Jenna Marbles. This week features a deep and cutting expose on the inner workings of the female mind while engaged in the act of driving. Having been in my fair share of automobiles with females driving, (in some cases nearly meeting death as a result,) I can attest with full conviction that this is an accurate depiction of what must be going through most girls’ minds when they are behind the wheel. Seriously, no offense ladies, but once the car door closes and your foot touches that gas pedal, it’s like your brains sever all neural pathways to the center that controls your higher motor functions and all synapses retreat deeply into the enigmatic netherverse hidden somewhere deep in your incredibly complicated psyches. I don’t get it. I never will.
Another Tuesday is upon us, greaslings! And with it comes another titillating episode of the web’s greatest, most ridiculous cooking show of all time! This week the boys of EMT bring it down and dirty, camping style. They venture outside to get crunked out and inspired by the culinary delights around the campfire. But not too far outside, ’cause they got tweets, to tweet, goddammit! If you love s’mores, gaze and be amazed at how they so unceremoniously bastardize, violate and sodomize your favorite campfire treat!
This week’s edition of the Jenna Marbles webisodes really solidified my love/hate relationship with drunk white girls. Or just drunk girls in general. One the one hand they’re sloppy, stumbling, disheveled and generally pathetic messes of mascara and eyeliner running down their faces while they bawl their eyes out about some boy who rejected them six months ago. On the other hand, a lot of times they feel inspired to take their clothes off for the entertainment of the male population nearby. I don’t know what that may say about some underlying daddy issues from their pasts, but as a male, it’s generally quite enjoyable. Especially if she’s not your girlfriend and you don’t even know the girl, much less have to talk to her.
With that said, here is Jenna Marbles’ take on drunken white girls at the club, I found it quite amusing, accurate, and true-to-form of her insightful journeys into the minds and psyches of the humans around us. Enjoy!
So, since I was thoroughly unimpressed with the episodes of Jenna Marbles and Epic Meal Time this week, I’ve decided to go a different route and throw my two cents in about two things most of us love; the joys of both music and totally sweet video games.
No doubt some of you, especially the video game fanatics out there have seen the TV spot for the new game coming out called “Dark Souls.” After seeing the spot played a few time while watching some of my favorite nerd shows on SyFy (I still hate the “new” spelling of the goddamn name,) I became intrigued by the choice of music behind the trailer’s stunning visuals. So I did a little digging and discovered what I understand is a relatively new band called The Silent Comedy, and the song featured in the spot is called “Bartholomew.” I’m sure there are also some of you who will say “oh I was way into them before this tv spot, I’m so fucking elite” and to that I answer, suck on my shitpipe you worthless hipster douchebag piece of shit.
Anyway, I did a 
slight bit of further digging and found their entirely self-produced most recent record called Common Faults (they recorded one prior EP with Atlantic Records, the name of which I am unaware,) which if you like the track “Bartholomew” you should probably acquire legally through their website, as I myself am clearly not an advocate of illegal pirating of music in any way whatsoever. There are videos of theirs scattered all across YouTube which you can find by doing a simple search for “The Silent Comedy.” Against my better judgement I checked out some of their other songs, and despite the fact that they all look like complete trendy hipster douchebags with their stupid little hats, PBR tallboys appearing throughout their videos, mod-esque clothing style and even one particularly intense handlebar mustache, the music is actually pretty decent. And I’m not even the type for this kind of music except that it kind of brings me back to a sort of heavier rendition of a ragtime soul/bluegrass era of music from the deep south. Being from the south myself, I have an appreciation of such things. Also they have a violinist, which scores them points with me. So despite how vehemently my hatred runs deep for their choice of outward appearances and conformity to the newest trendy norm of hipster fashion and aesthetics, I must give them credit for not totally sucking the sweaty ballsack of a donkey in their efforts to make music. Much like I can’t stand the visual appearance of Mumford and Sons, I do thoroughly enjoy their pared-down folksy sound.
Anyway, with that said, I give to you both the Dark Souls trailer featuring their song “Bartholomew” and a longer, unedited cut of the song itself. If you like it, I recommend downloa… er… buying, through completely legal means, their CD entitled Common Faults available from www.thesilentcomedy.com and I’m sure retailers somewhere who still give a shit about music instead of fucking Lady Gaga. (Who just for the record, I would murder with my bare hands if I had half a snowball’s chance in hell of getting away with it.)
